Wednesday 11 December 2013

Some Other Carol



It went quite well, as far as PCC meetings go. The rector mentioned in passing that one of his neighbours was about to cut down some over grown Christmas trees and was happy to donate them to his three churches if they would like them. We all nodded in unison. The weeks flew by and it was the day of our Carol Service.

The church warden popped down to the church a couple of hours before the service was to begin, just to check that the heating had come on properly and that everything was as it should be. Aw no! A huge Norwegian Spruce was lying prostrate, sprawled out in the aisle, blocking all access to the front of the church. The branches flopped across the pews on either side so nobody could sit down either. Racing outside to find a container, she thankfully discovered a biggish blue plastic bucket by the tap under the yew tree. No time to lose, she filled it with some liftable stones. Picking her way, over the prickly branches, with panic beginning to rise like high tide, she tugged and she pulled, pushed and grunted. She was only five feet three and this monster had to be all of eight feet. Supreme effort and dripping in perspiration, she managed to get the thing to as near the lecturn as she could. Bucket filled and tree at last upright even if it was leaning drunkenly against the north wall.

At this point, the door creaked and a lady walked in. She said that she lived a distance away and had come as she did every year to visit her husband's grave. Noticing the lights on, she ventured into the church. They chatted for a little while as she shared her life story. After she left, the churchwarden zipped home to take the decorations off her own tree and attempt to cover some of the nakedness of  the inebriated giant.

Breathless, churchwarden finished and hoovered up minutes before the first of the congregation arrived. Goodness knows what she looked like. The service progressed. The last lesson read and the last carol sung. The lady sitting in the seat behind, tapped me on the shoulder. She said how shocked and disgusted she was to see almost nothing on the Christmas Tree. Considering this thing, (like I said) was towering eight feet and our own tree, less than three, it didn't really come as a big surprise. So I just nodded in agreement.


21 comments:

  1. Grr! I bet it never occurred to the woman who tapped you on the shoulder that 8 foot Christmas trees don't decorate themselves and perhaps another year she could offer to help. The poor churchwarden. I think she managed a minor miracle in the circumstances.

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  2. It happened about 20 years ago - I think I could write a book on 'It shouldn't happen to a church warden' Looking back - it seems a lot funnier now than when I was a very green CW in those days. I did the job for four years.

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    1. Doh. I didn't make the connection that you were the churchwarden in question. I reckon you (and most churchwardens) deserve a medal. :-)

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  3. Oh Molly. What a very sincere churchwarden.....some people just don't get the respect they should. Sometimes it is best just to nod in agreement, while biting your tongue of course.

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    1. Its a lot of water under a lot of bridges. I left that church in 2005, there are no hard feelings, sometimes you just have to move on.

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  4. There won't be any bells ringing in heaven for that sharp tongued person....but you my dear...all the bells ringing out at once joyous joyous joyous...

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    1. Actually, she's not that bad. She's long been forgiven

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  5. There's just no pleasing some people; we smile and wave them off.

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  6. Maybe they should have hung a notice on the tree saying 'Tree decorating next Saturday, all welcome, bring your own decorations!'.

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    1. I never did find out who sneaked the wretched thing in on the day of the carol service and never told anybody. Maybe none of us thought to ask - these things make you a lot wiser in future.

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  7. This sounds a bit like housework I think Molly - all the effort women put in just to keep things vaguely on track and people only notice what hasn't been done! Well done for turning the other cheek and biting your tongue. Today, I have already bitten mine hard - my partner came in with a very wet, muddy dog, denied she was as bad as she looked and let her shake herself all over the clean kitchen. I shall bide my time...

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  8. No Christmas spirit from the lady behind the Christmas angel who tried her best to make the service meaningful. Good for you Molly, for being the better person you are.

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    1. She's OK really - a bit of a one to gossip. She never realised it was my handiwork (or lack of it) she was criticizing.

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  9. You should have said there were a ton of ornaments on the tree and that maybe she should get her eyes checked. Alright, that wouldn't be very nice. Love the little tree up top!

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    1. It was a lot easier getting the star up on that one.

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  10. I agree with Bonnie's comment - sometimes just best to nod in agreement and move on :)

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  11. You had more control and Christmas kindness toward the thoughtless woman than I could have ever mustered. God bless you.

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  12. Oh gosh - don't know about that. I blush when I think of how little there was on that sad leaning tree, but I have to smile too, remembering the nightmare.

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