Thursday 18 October 2012

Keep Between The Lines


 Following on from John and Tom's recent blog posts, I'm writing another of those 'funeral' stories.  It really isn't intended to make light of someone's pain. No way! That's the last thing in the world I would want to do. The events just appealed to my wooky sense of humour. Bear with me.
It happened in Welshpool a couple of years ago when there was rumour of a tanker driver's strike.  The price of petrol and diesel was going through the roof and the petrol station was choc-a-bloc.
'No worries for him about the cost of diesel', Other Half remarked. We were quietly waiting our turn in the queue at the pumps. A sleek black hearse passed by on the main road ahead of us. The coffin was draped with the Union Jack and a wreath of white roses and lilies balanced on the top of it. The driver drove sedately over the mini roundabout and disappeared from view towards the town centre. Our turn to fill up - £1.33 per litre, cripes! (and that's nothing to what they're charging now). O/H did the necessary and joined the other queue at the till in the shop. I sat in the passenger seat idly watching the world go by. Suddenly the same hearse appeared from the opposite direction, going like a bat out of hell. Oops! Wrong venue! Oh shite!
The driver, mobile phone pressed against his ear - never-mind-the-law and one hand rolling the steering wheel. He shot over the mini roundabout, the coffin fairly bounced.  I was quite expecting his fare to sit straight up and tap him on the shoulder and tell him to slow down or end up by the side of him in the passenger seat. I never forgot it.
Another near death experience I had this week We have a green rain barrel at the top end of the poly tunnel. As I bent down to fill the watering can, I noticed something strange floating on top of the water. It was yellow and black no more than 2 “ long, with drooping exhausted wings. I picked a leaf from the apple tree and gently scooped the little insect to the relative safety of an upturned plant pot. It was a baby dragon fly. The warmth of the afternoon sun dried the tiny wings and before too long he was buzzing again with the joy of life and in the morning he was gone!

19 comments:

  1. Speeding hearses are never a good thing and always stand out.

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    1. That is the only time I've ever seen that happen. Hope the family were unaware of the mix-up and everything went smoothly at the right venue.

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  2. Lovely story of the funeral. Pleased you were able to save the dragonfly.

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    1. the dragon fly story is one of those sweet little moments that remind us we are human.......
      I loved it

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  3. Do you suppose he was late for his own funeral?

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    1. The way he was driving, it could have been a toss up between 20 minutes late in this world or 20 years early in the next.

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  4. That's one of those quirky incidents it's hard to forget Molly. So glad you could rescue the dragonfly. :-)

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  5. You need to cry at a wedding and laugh at a funeral....at my father;s funeral, there was a stranger in the back sobbing her little heart out...at the end she asked if she could speak...we all held our breath. Turns out she was the barmaid from his local and over great sobs she told us stories about him and how amazing he was.....we were all stunned.

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    1. Chania, your Dad must have been deeply loved. It would be so good to write those stories down for.

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  6. I knew we'd have enough good funeral stories to fill a volume, thanks to the two of them.

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  7. What a great story that was about the lost corpse. If it was a man, he had probably spent his life not asking for directions and drove his wife crazy. Maybe this was just Karma.

    Loved your other story also. You are such a sweet, kind lady.

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  8. Several big Dragonflies have recently turned up here too. As our doors are usually open, they fly around the house and occasionally get caught in a cobweb. Releasing them is fun!

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  9. I'm so glad you saved the dragonfly!
    I tried to save a bee recently, but he had a broken leg, so I'm not sure how long he lived after I placed him back on a bush.

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  10. Can't even imagine a coffin opening up and somebody popping out. What a story!

    And there must be a special fairyland award for saving a dragonfly!

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    1. It would have been a bit hairy if he had have done. Dragon flies are such pretty little insects - it was enough just to have it recover.

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  11. I tell you, you've had some of the oddest encounters and you write entertaining stories about them Molly. I'm very happy you saved the dragonfly. One afternoon as I was driving down a back road I came upon a squirrel laying just in the middle of the road. I'm not sure what compelled me to do it, but I stopped the car. He was laying perfectly still but his eyes were opened and looked clear - and he was breathing! I looked around, found a stick, and gave him a gently poke. His legs jerked and he slowly came to life. The poor guy had simply been knocked out. It took awhile but he did eventually get his act together enough to run like heck for the nearest tree. Saving a life, not matter how small, is a gift, both ways.
    Always a pleasure Molly. Happy weekend to you.

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  12. this story reminds me of a movie whose name escapes me now...but they delivered the wrong body to the home of the diceased....very funny stuff. Better to laugh at times like those I suppose.

    And what a beautiful heart you have saving the dragon fly I am standing and clapping my hands right now, no truly...I am, you just can't see....

    have a grand day :)

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  13. That’s exactly the sort of thing I’d do, I too rescue anything and everything, even a trapped wasp in the conservatory. I know, I’m probably stupid.

    I love the story of the hearse. Talk about being late for your own funeral!

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  14. I loved this post and it made my day start with a smile,like you strange things tickle my "funny bone".

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